Should you hit your kids?

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Percy Jackson(sorry)
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Should you hit your kids?

Post by Percy Jackson(sorry) » Tue 17th Mar 2020

okay, in this topic, I obviously don't mean child abuse, but what do you think about hitting your kids? And to what extremes? When is it considered child abuse?

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Cabaline
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Re: Should you hit your kids?

Post by Cabaline » Tue 17th Mar 2020

I don't believe you should ever smack or spank your child as a method of behaviour management. It has been proven that it doesn't do anything other than make them fear you, and not in any healthy way.

It's better to have consequences to actions that are explained at a level they can understand. Kids are capable of understanding "When you throw your food on the floor, it hurts mommy's feelings and makes a mess. For hurting mommy's feelings she deserves an apology, for making a mess you will not be able to play with this toy today". And when you encourage a kid to apologise, you should always thank them for their apology and say that you forgive them, so that they learn how apologies work.

But if you just spank your child if they throw something on the floor, all they learn is "sometimes mommy hits me". It doesn't teach them structure or patience or kindness or manners. But it does teach them that you are allowed to hit someone if you want to. It teaches them that they can expect to be hit by adults and cannot fight back.

I think that hitting your child on any level is child abuse. They cannot fight back and you are using your power and your strength to hurt them, frighten them, and get them to do what you want. Which is the very definition of abuse. I am not OK with it ever.
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Percy Jackson(sorry)
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Re: Should you hit your kids?

Post by Percy Jackson(sorry) » Tue 17th Mar 2020

I think you are totally right.

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Re: Should you hit your kids?

Post by Josephine Fowl » Thu 26th Mar 2020

I also strongly believe that hitting your kids for any reason is absolutely not okay.

It has been proven time and time again that young kids cannot draw the distinction between their actions and being punished with physical abuse such as spanking. And by the time the kids are able to draw this connection, they are also better able to understand the verbal expressions "that's not okay, you shouldn't be doing this", which just furthers the idea that spanking/hitting/assaulting your kids is not okay.

All you teach your kids is that you can and will hurt them.

I see a lot of people, especially on Facebook unfortunately, saying "my parents spanked me when I was a kid and I turned out fine - so I will also spank my kids because it works", while that is in fact not how it works. Your parents abused their authority and physical strength over you and now you are just continuing the cycle of abuse.

Is that mean? I don't care.

Don't hit your kids, kids.
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